Self-Ish

Self-ish Cover Art.jpg
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Self-ish Cover Art.jpg
Screen Shot 2015-01-26 at 4.16.21 PM.png
Screen Shot 2015-01-26 at 4.16.36 PM.png
Screen Shot 2015-01-26 at 4.17.00 PM.png

Self-Ish

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To say ‘I love you’ one must know first how to say the ‘I’.
— Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead
I could die for you. But I couldn’t, and wouldn’t, live for you.
— Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead

In 2012-2013 I read Ayn Rand's book The Fountainhead and adored how she played with the idea of selfishness meaning something entirely different than the negative value we have associated with it.

Rand implies that those who are selfish have a sense of self and those who are selfless have no sense of self. Through the course of 2014 I wrote weekly pieces called Magic Mail which I shared with my beloved Secret Message Society. The Magic Mail was inspired by the courtroom scene from The Fountainhead, where Howard Roark gives his stirring speech on his own behalf as the defendant. It may interest you to know, Roark is an artist in his own right - an architect.

Going through a personal transition in my life I had MAD passion to see about my own creative mattering in 2014, and I decided this sort of vulnerable and risky exploration lent itself beautifully to be shared in a context such as the Secret Message Society.

Now I have compiled the essays (40+) into one eBook, written selfishly for me and lovingly shared with you.

As I read through the compilation I realize I have created a specific account of what it looks like to be an artist in the "real world." To have certain dreams and hopes not pan out as you intended and to find it necessary to pull from that great reservoir within oneself of what Anais Nin calls the "Artist as Magician." What I learned to do this year and what I proved to myself through these writings is that I can create magic to get myself through hard situations, and that it is a delectable sort of wielding of my artistic skills. It was through this experience that I felt the underpinnings for starting The Magic School - I was using Ayn Rand's fictional book (which served as a beacon during a difficult transitionary time of my life) and interweaving it with the writing of my own real life's story. ♥